I think before I get into this, I need to tell you all my secret.

I... have a special power.

Yeah, I know, such genetic mutations are a billion-to-one occurrence, and I truly feel blessed to have this unique ability. I know that "With great power comes great responsibility," so I pledge to use this power for the benefit of mankind, and will not become a super villain.

What's my special power?

I see web sites.

No seriously! I do! Practically every show or movie I watch, I catch those little flashed mentions of random sites and remember them! For example, the Spouse of Swan and I went to the OMNI theater to see Journey into Amazing Caves, and I noticed www.nancy4caves.net, this little site they use as a thematic crutch to keep the "plot" moving along. And what did I do when I got back to my comptuer? I looked it up!

Other examples? Feast your eyes, mon frére!

But that's nothing. Okay, NBC. I know you've got your buzz trackers out there looking to see what those crazy kids on the blogosphere are saying about your favorite little show, Heroes. Well warm up those Weapons of Mass Media Divination, because I'm about to give ya some ammo.

Did anyone out there watch this episode? Did you notice in the "prevously on Heroes" mini-trailer a full-on shot of Bennet's business card? Especially the back with this lovely web site:


Head on over there, and you'll see something that's a dead giveaway of a site that some big company is trying to take viral - design that looks circa 1996. But heavens to Betsy, there's a FORM on there! Well, since I know Primatech isn't hiring these days (although I'm always looking for a better offer), I went ahead and signed up. In their own considerate way, they managed to send an auto-reply:

To: eswayne@gmail.com

from: no-reply@primatechpaper.com

Re: Important Message from Primatech Paper

Thank you for your interest in Primatech Paper. We will be in contact once we evaluate your application.

Ah HUH. Two days later, I got this:

To: eswayne@gmail.com

from: no-reply@primatechpaper.com

Re: Important Message from Primatech Paper

Thank you for your interest in Primatech Paper and taking the time to complete our employee application.

We are always interested in unique individuals with special abilities to help us provide the best service to our many clients.

Please retain this email for your records. A Primatech Paper representative will be contacting you in a few weeks with the next steps.

Considerate! Glad they'll be contacting me, since as I have stated earlier, I AM special. But then, a couple days after that, we get the REAL payoff:

To: eswayne@gmail.com

from: no-reply@primatechpaper.com

Re: Plan A

Our first plan has gone into effect. Let's get together to observe. Go online to: http://www.samantha48616e61.com before 9:00 PM tonight.

Head on over to that site, and you're in PRIME viral marketing territory. A fake blog? Excellent! Hidden links on primatechpaper.com? Even better! Hidden dossiers on some of the Heroes characters, including one we haven't even seen yet? Perfect!

Ohhhh no, gentle reader, I've brought you this far. For all those lovely goodies, you're on your own.


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Yep, out there in the atrium there's one of those "come on in and sit down, cause we're not total corporate stiffs" areas. And there's a couch - what I might label a "two-butter."

I'd like to be out on that couch.

Laying down.


Snoring loudly in the reverberating atrium for EVERYONE to hear.



Since I've got a cat of my own, I know the joys of bathing said feline. Thankfully, I never got reactions like these!

TONS more lovely cat washing photos can be found here.

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This is ME... except for the accountant part.

Via Extralife

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Fascinating video here about how the Web is affecting our society's interactions. I can barely imagine how connected my son is going to be when he hits those socially crucial teenage years...

Via John Battelle's Searchblog

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I know we're out of season here, but I couldn't resist posting this:

Via Ze Frank.



No kidding, that is an actual line from the first ever episode of Voltron. You, too, can see how it all began, here:

This one's all for you, Wade.


I know we're all friends here, so I feel really good about getting these things off my chest:

  • I actually get excited when I go to the bathroom at work for a "#2" and see that the stall at the end of the row is open, because the other one is for handicapped people, and even though I've never seen anyone in a wheelchair in my building, I'm always worried that if I go in there someone's going to roll in the restroom needing that stall.

  • I think the main reason French fries are in this world is to be a vehicle for ketchup. Waffle fries were created with this in mind, because they have more surface area, and thus, can carry more ketchup.

  • When I heard about that peanut-butter recall this morning, I KNEW my mother-in-law would call us and ask if we'd checked our peanut-butter.

    And at about 10am 8:30am, she did.

  • I'm re-reading Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's "The Hound of the Baskervilles". For at LEAST the third time. As an ebook on my PDA.

  • I've seen Bloodrayne. YOU shouldn't. It's that bad.

  • On one of my Pandora stations, I actually gave a "thumbs up" to a song by BRATZ. Yep, that's the pseudo-group of dolls for pre-adolescent girls.

  • I got this coffee maker for free.

  • When our power went out a couple of days ago, my first thought wasn't "Gee, I wonder if a power line went down?", it was "Oh crap, I hope I paid my electricity bill!"

  • I'm sick of people acting like I'm going to have a coronary the first time I have to change a stinky diaper. I'm a GUY. I went to college. I've smelled A LOT of nasty things, and I'm still here to talk about it.

  • I really, really , really, really, really, really wish I still had my old Voltron toys. Not because I want to sell them, but because I want to have them prominently displayed in my house somewhere.

Update: My wife informed me that the mother-in-law called at 8:30am, which is much different when you're trying to sleep, apparently.

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  1. I love my son. I haven't even met the little guy yet and I'm already completely retarded about him.

  2. That being said, I am going to get to be his Dad, which means I'm completely entitled to have fun at his expense.

  3. The aliens we are dealing with here will be of the Ridley Scott variety, or alternately, the one making an appearance in the diner scene of Spaceballs.

  4. Your baby's mileage may vary.



Starts life as an egg.Same.
Can not survive early development without a parasitic relationship with its host.Same, although said host generally feels better about having a baby.
Robs the host of valuable nutrients and energy.Gives the host ample opportunity to enjoy the brunch buffet.
Exits the host in a violent and destructive fashion.Usually the worst thing that happens is that the new Dad faints.
Has an unusual shriek used for rudimentary communication.Yep, got that too.
Requires a woman's special talents to be brought into order.Same here - no flamethrowers, please.
Excretes gooey slime that dissolves practically any object it comes in contact with.Have you SEEN my diaper??
Brings drama and tension to its environment.You'd better believe it.
Plenty of sequels.Let's go for just one more, ok? :-)



Hi all - I'm trying out a new blogging software from Performancing, so this seemed an easy way to give it a test run.

Here's some of the top blog posts I've read today:



Yep, looks like my 15 minutes of fame have started. iParenting has named "We All Use Math Every Day" as one of their top sites for 2007. I do all the layout, code and administration for this site, and co-designed it with my good buddy Rondo. You'd better believe this is high-quality resume material, here!



I didn't expect to post about this next, but I couldn't help myself...

With the squid arriving soon, I've found myself drawn to any and everything about parenting, education and generally raising kids. So it shouldn't come as a surprise that I was recently drawn to this video from the afore mentioned TED Talks. Their description serves it best:

Sir Ken Robinson makes an entertaining (and profoundly moving) case for creating an education system that nurtures creativity, rather than ... all » undermining it. Robinson is author of "Out of Our Minds: Learning to be Creative", and a leading expert on innovation and human resources. (Recorded February 2006 in Monterey, CA. Duration: 20:03)

Future parent or not, educator or not, I think this is required material. Because if we can't nurture our creativity, we can't hope to solve the problems of the future.