Drying Off
Originally uploaded by Stop Looking At Me Swan.

New and improved with 100% more baby stories!

  • That picture has nothing to do with this post - I just wanted to put it in there because he's cute.

  • I'm secretly happy every time Lukas goes on a wailing spree at night, because our "neighbors" who share the wall behind the headboard of our bed have been playing loud rap music at the worst possible times ever since we moved in. Serves 'em right.

  • The Umbilical Cord just isn't human. It looks like something from a sci-fi movie. If computers ever advance to the point where we're using artificial-life driven processing power and genetically engineered bio-processors, they'd better not make the cord on my mouse look like an Umbilical Cord, or I'm not gonna use it.

  • If you're asleep for 3 hours, then awake for 1 hour, then asleep for 3 hours, then awake for 1 hour, then asleep for 3 hours, your body believes it has been awake for a total of 36 hours, and has slept for about 3 seconds.

  • Newborn baby diapers aren't that bad. They look like tar in a blanket, but they don't smell. I've heard they get worse from here.

  • Despite all I've been through, I still think the word "nipple" is funny.

  • Yes, you can assemble a bottle and a breast pump while asleep and in the dark.

  • Baby hiccups are funny, even though you feel like they're not supposed to be

  • There's a chemical byproduct of birth that babies gradually get rid of through their waste that's called Billiruben. This is the same thing that causes babies to get jaundiced and have to be baked under UV lights. It's also the stupidest-sounding medical term you will hear in a nursery.

  • I've never been more excited or cracked up by a sneeze, fart, burp or face than when my son does them.

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Originally uploaded by Stop Looking At Me Swan.
Believe it or not, I actually heard that a lot in those last few days of pregnancy. A part of me wanted to ask them "What in the world makes you think so? Could you tell me so I can feel better about what's going to happen??"

Well, now I get to find out for myself. Lukas was born at 7:24pm on Thursday, April 19. He weighed in at 8lbs 5oz, and was 20¾ inches long. Definitely, that was bigger than we thought he was going to be.

I bawled when he came. Just cranked up the waterworks. Turns out that being up since 4am that day had made my eyes pretty tired, so crying made them burn a little, which made me cry even more! It's weird memories like that that stick in your head when these chaotic moments are over.

The doctors say he's healthy, and we say he's perfect. Mom is tired and at the same time overjoyed. Me... well, the word that probably best describes it is Awestruck.



Allow me to informally introduce you to The P.E.A.K. Brothers - a collaborative blog project I'm contributing to. You can find out more about it in our little welcome post.

And here's where I decided to join the conversation. No surprise - it's about kids.




So the dear wife and I were out looking for a Secret Sister gift from a local Christian Bookstore, and we noticed that they not only HAD these cute little items, but were running a special on them! They're called Resurrection Eggs, and I thought I was going to write a big blog entry referencing the Origin of the Easter Bunny, and why it was silly to use an ancient, pagan symbol of fertility (the Egg, not the plastic) to educate kids about the Lord Our Savior Jesus Christ.

But then, I decided to actually use my brain.

Kids don't care about the eggs. Kids don't think of them as a pagan symbol, and kids have no clue where the Easter Bunny comes from, nor do they care - as long as they get candy. Easter Eggs are about discovery, surprises, and rewards.

And actually, that's what the Resurrection is about, too.

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You know those times you thought I was singing the praises of the extra monitor just because I'm a geek? Well how 'bout these apples!

Microsoft researchers haven't perfected the genie, but they've found a tool that can increase your productivity by 9 to 50 percent and make your work day easier. And you can begin using it right away.

The researchers conducted user studies that proved the effectiveness of adding a second or even third monitor to your workstation, creating a wide-screen effect. In addition, they found out how the operating system needs to change to accommodate a larger screen area.

Yep, it's ALL true.

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Ok, I'm going to post something MUCH more worthy of introspection and thought later, but for now, I thought this was DARN funny: